Forgive yourself

It’s not your fault

It doesn’t matter

What is broke

You have to build

To start again

To heal yourself

To find a friend

Talk to someone

Keep them close

You need that now

Probably the most

It will get better

A day at a time

Love yourself

And you’ll be fine

I’m looking to be happy again

One day at a time

It’s been hard recently

Even finding words to rhyme

Just existing is hard to do

Sometimes wanting something new

But all is hard and effort is taxing

I’m afraid my limit is already at maximum

For all that have fallen and passed through my hands

Unfortunately I have never been a strong enough man

Even one step in front of me seems blocked everyday

I have to break myself to pass and find a way

But every time I break I have to put myself back together

This healing is so long, I fear it could last forever

What do I use to build myself back up?

Every time I glue I always come unstuck

I don’t trust anymore to accept someone’s help

Am I really destined to be by myself ?

Feelings dire

As alone again

Overwhelming

Until when

I can’t work out

Why I feel?

So bothered now

Lost the will

I cry inside

To myself

Silently

Never out

I’m always strong

Can’t you see?

Look at me

Happy, be free

It’s all a lie

I’m dead inside

Pushing away

Through the tide

Why is it here?

This crippling force

Suffocating

With all its torque

It will last for hours

A day or two

Until it eats me

Until it’s through

I thought I wanted it

My mind lied

It told me I did

It’s not the case

I have gone so long

Just getting by

Dipping confrontation

Forgoing why

And now all his changed

I can be free

To want again

To restart

The problem is

I don’t know how

I can’t force myself

And I don’t want to

Why do I do this?

Want something

Then when it’s there

Throw it far away

What’s wrong with me?

Is it me?

Yeah, it’s fucking me

I’m so broken

I don’t like the rain

How it makes me feel

Stuck indoors

With life so real

How can I change?

If I’m gonna get wet

I don’t like the feeling

What to expect

It all seems so much

Too many things to deal

Why does it do this?

Make everything surreal

I just want the warmth

So I can suppress

To pretend for a moment

And forget the mess

Do you ever feel like everything is too much?

Doing anything seems too much

Procrastination is all you do

Pleasure rarely exists

It is much too fleeting

Years waiting for time to just pass by

Sleep patterns so messed up

You either sleep or you think

Brain turns on like a switch

Overactive as always

Calculating every possible decision

Consequence or even stupid thing

You have to watch your phone

Just to zone out

To forget the day passed

To not think of tomorrow

Or whatever is to come

Draining off whatever emotions you have

To gradually fade away

I wish I could