Put one between my eyes
I hope I don’t feel it
Can’t be anymore painful
Than now
Tag: suicide
Trying to be strong
My emotions are really overcoming now
Trying to be strong
But the shell has been cracked
And water is forcing itself in
I don’t know what will kill me first
The suffocation or the want to leave
The tears won’t stop coming
I can be free but I don’t want to
I could leave but I don’t want to
I could end it but I don’t want to
I could live but I don’t want to
I don’t want to eat
I don’t want to live
I don’t want to work
I don’t want to love
I don’t want to be loved
Overwhelmed is a feeling?
Purgatory is possible when we are alive?
When I die I want to be burnt
I want to be free
Don’t put me in a box
Forcing people to visit me
Let me fly one last time
Let me feel the wind
I love not feeling it’s coldness
It feels good not being cold
I’m tired
I wish I could be helped
This soul is lost
It’s hard to find light
When darkness is all around us
I cut my eyes out
Because I don’t want to see anymore
Please take them
Please
.
Only the silence can hear me
Only the silence can hear me
My innermost thoughts
Can I confide in you?
Will you judge me?
I don’t dare say
Because I’m scared
I whisper
Then
Silence
.
.
I don’t know what to do
To say
Then
My words beat me
I just wanted
To confide
I’m sorry
Looking in the mirror
Shame staring back
Regret in my eyes
Why did you talk?
Can’t do this anymore
Swallow me up
Spit me out
Crush me with your foot
And leave me to die
I don’t want to stay
To exist anymore
I fucking hate life
Every minute every chore
If I had the courage
I would end it all
But because I’m a coward
I’ll shoulder my fall
I hate it more
With every breath
What’s the point?
This torturous test
Take your head
Smash it against the wall
That’s what it feels like
Life this is called
Wish I could choke
Kick the chair to the floor
If I wasn’t so scared
Can’t do this anymore
Suicidal swill
Drained, tired, had enough
This funny thing called love
Misunderstood words, different views
Body sick gonna spew
Recuperate energy, charge up
Batteries empty, never last
Easy way out, selfish way
Tablets cupboard, cowards play
Cocktail vodka mixed with pills
Do the trick, suicidal swill
.
Philip lister 15/10/17
Taken from Rhyming poetry to change your day by Philip Lister
Have I become invisible?
Why can I not touch you?
Where did it all go wrong?
Why does nothing happen?
What is this song?
The days go by
The months rack up
Have I become invisible?
What is this love?
If I do not exist
Then why do we do this?
Put a stop to this torment
With a poison kiss
Forever searched love
In all its perfection
Maybe I will find it
In my resurrection
Selfish greed
I sometimes think of the noose
The great escape
The selfish greed of getting out
Leaving everyone to clear up the mess
.
The heavy sack on my back
Voluntarily pulling me down
I don’t want to breathe
I don’t want to fight
.
I’m tired
Good for nothing
What do I give?
What is the point?
.
If I could I would
Just give up
Fade away
Who the fuck cares
Sure I won’t be missed
I hate money
It’s control over us
Can’t get enough of it
It causes such a fuss
.
Everything depends on it
Can’t get away
Always need more of it
At the end of every day
.
Debt comes to bite your ass
And it rips you a new hole
It tosses the windows out
Until the vacuum takes hold
.
There are always others
That are much worse off than me
But my biggest stress of all
It has its way with me
.
So much worry
So much stress
Sometimes wondering
What is this test
.
Cars always breaking down
Kids to pay for
Working for your job
Feeling like a whore
.
Now we have to live to work
To pay all the fucking bills
Eating all my insides out
Like a poisonous swill
.
What is next to save myself
To get away from this
Put a bullet through my skull
Sure I won’t be missed
Suffering weep
So so young
In the bedroom alone
Dark dark feelings
In the family home
.
Penknife out
Grating the skin
Starting to cut now
Pushing within
.
Feeling the pain
Gritting the teeth
Seeing the blood
Feeling misbelief
.
Tears of rage
Flow from eyes
Hating everything
True despise
.
Hating life
To finally stop
Giving up
Had enough
.
Laying down
Looking up
Regretting now
The open cut
.
Old t shirt
Wrapped around
Foetal silence
Not a sound
.
Tired now
Suffering weep
Teary dreams
Fading to sleep
Why is depression so overwhelming?
Why is depression so overwhelming?
It seems as if fighting it is useless but I don’t even know why it is there.
I didn’t go to bed with it but it lays with my head on the pillow and when I look at myself brushing my teeth.
The car journey to work automatic as my brain tells me stories of what I can do as it holds me captive as I cannot switch off.
It is so heavy, piggy backing me while I get my coffee and sit down at my desk.
Thank god I have my job to push these thoughts away.
Get off my back!
Listerslyrics 