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Good evening

Good evening to you

You lovely peeps

I’m tired now

I want to sleep

I have a sore throat

Doing me in

I need to sleep

Have to give in

I saw my friends

I needed that

Felt good to talk

To have a good chat

Keep being you

Don’t ever change

Wait for tomorrow

It won’t be the same

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Have faith

I need a cuddle in the morning

There is no better drug

To start off my day

I don’t need money

I just need to feel loved

It’s difficult to feel meh

What is meh?

Why do we have bad days

I feel the worry from the day

Creeping up on me the evening

Whispering in my ear

“I’m here”

I don’t want it

But no matter how much I run

It shadows me

Life isn’t easy

It probably never will be

These challenges are meant to test us

And test they will

My will power will fight on the hills

With honor but kindness

And when I say fight I mean non confrontational

Positive thinking

Because who needs negativeness

That’s eats away

Buttering up our self doubt

One day at a time

One day at a time

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What is wrong now?

I feel like crying

I don’t know why

The tears just flow

Down from my eyes

I feel so heavy

Morale on the floor

Up and down

Like a rotating door

Why this feeling?

This constant down

What is wrong now?

Why the constant frown?

I can’t even put my hand on it

Even if I wanted too

It’s everything

And this will just not do

All the funny videos

All the cuddly cats

Just isn’t picking me up

What’s up with that?

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I’d like to be a cat

I love the sun on my face

It’s all I need to brighten my day

To make the problems leave

They don’t seem so big now

As I sit on the terrace leaning back

Just wishing for life to show me

What I should do next?

I shouldn’t care about the next problem

Just enjoy the moment

As the wind whistles in my ear

As I watch the busy birds

Hurriedly building their nests

The cat watching from under the table

Waiting for it’s moment

It must be nice to be a cat

Daydreaming all day long

Preying on innocent little things

Food prepared for you

Eat sleep repeat

A warm bed, a cuddle when needed

Space when you want

I’d like to be a cat

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Save your tears for someone who cares

Save your tears for someone who cares

This life we live, the wounds it bares

It slices our flesh to the state of no repair

Our social capacity as people stare

We are but an exhibit for others to watch

As they judge and point and laugh a lot

We are not what we should be in their eyes

Was it really such a surprise?

As we hurt ourselves, our heart and soul

Just fitting in, paying with our souls

Breathing the gasses of poisonous lies

From politicians with money in their eyes

They feed the rich and fuck the poor

Then hold their hands out and ask for more

And what do you get from all of this ?

Can’t even afford heating, something’s amiss

We work to live and to pay our debts

Until we’re old, finished and inept

To pay for our lives to make the world go round

Sorry, are you talking, I didn’t hear a sound

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Even though you’re gone

I used to look for love

Craved it more than anything

But now I’m so lost on my path

Fighting myself within

Where did I wander?

Falling to the abyss

Why were my choices so wrong?

What was so amiss?

What is wrong with me now?

Why does it fall apart?

Such pity and self doubt

Pumping through my heart

I just question everything I do

As if every decision was wrong

How can you still be with me?

Even though you’re gone?

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My phone

How does it control me?

Why can I not leave it alone?

What is this pull over me?

When I take my phone

.

Every waking hour

Glued eyes to the screen

I cannot stop myself

Cannot keep myself clean

.

How can this be an addiction?

As bad as a drug

Why do I want it so?

Is this called love?

.

Watching every notification

As the text flashes by

As if the most important thing

In my life is a lie

.

Why do I not want it to stop?

Another pointless sound

I just like to be busy

When there is nothing around

.

It is my dearest friend

It knows me better than me

If it could be my drug

It would be my ecstacy

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Only the silence can hear me

Only the silence can hear me

My innermost thoughts

Can I confide in you?

Will you judge me?

I don’t dare say

Because I’m scared

I whisper

Then

Silence

.

.

I don’t know what to do

To say

Then

My words beat me

I just wanted

To confide

I’m sorry

Looking in the mirror

Shame staring back

Regret in my eyes

Why did you talk?

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Isn’t it funny what death is?

How does death change your perspective?

Isn’t it funny what death is?

What does it change?

Does it make us poorer?

Richer? Happier or sad?

Overjoyed, miserable?

Negative or mad?

What’s the first thing on our mind?

What did this person leave behind?

All the treasures you have to go through

Most of it junk, now they are through

What about the cockroaches that want a part

The fuckers that were never there from the fucking start

Why is everything money, what do they want?

Just their part of it, of course it belongs

Funny thing death, it’s never the same

If it wasn’t complicated it would be lame